Gianni's Bar and Grille. Guns and shit. And Bourbon. And occasional side boob

Gianni's Bar and Grille. Guns and shit. And Bourbon. And occasional side boob (http://www.nobigtoe.com/index.php)
-   The Lt. Allen Swanson Project (http://www.nobigtoe.com/forumdisplay.php?f=44)
-   -   Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs! (http://www.nobigtoe.com/showthread.php?t=12050)

maladjusted 8th August 2005 15:01

Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Got this in email from Botach (fucking rip off high speed low drag accessory purveyor that I'd never order from, not sure how the fuck I got on their list)

Meals are produced by using only the finest ingredients. Shelf stability for up to the twenty four months is achieved through a unique process, where the meals are twice cooked. They are first cooked to 160°F to inhibit the introduction of any bacteria. After specialized packaging, vacuuming and sealing it is again cooked; this time at high heat. This state-of-the art process has absolutely no effect on the taste or texture of the product, giving you a fresh home cooked taste all the time. The patented Flameless Ration Heater (FRH) is comprised of all natural and safe materials, containing only food grade iron, magnesium and sodium, emitting no toxic fumes. Self heating your meal is easily achieved anywhere by pouring a water sodium solution from the enclosed pouch over the heating element to activate heater. Our extra large entrees are a full ¾ of a pound (12 oz.), for a hearty and satisfying meal.
La Briute's state of the art manufacturing facility utilizes the most modern food preparation and packaging equipment. Our production staff includes a team of highly skilled culinary experts and outstanding chefs experienced in meal planning, as well as a professionally trained technical staff to insure proper packaging plus all other health and safety concerns. Our plant is HACCP approved and inspected by the United States Department of Agriculture as well as the FSIS/FDA

In addition to a host of other certifications and inspections, La Briute boasts a Kashruth supervision satisfying even the most stringent standards in Kosher certification. Complementing our supervision by the nationally acclaimed Kof-K certifying agency, our production carries the personal hashgocha of Rabbi Shiya Katz, and is always Bishul Yisroel - Bais Yoseph. Rabbi Katz, the respected Magreve Rav is a senior member of the Central Rabbinical Congress (Hisachdus) and his kosher supervision is highly regarded and revered amongst the most uncompromising consumers.All Meats are all Glatt and of Chassidishe Shechita, and all leafy greens or other possibly infested produce are meticulously inspected.
La Bruite Meals contain a patented, flameless food heater made of magnesium and iron. When the enclosed salt water packet is opened and poured onto the heating element it produces real heat and steam right inside the box, and your meal turns simmering hot in minutes. The meals can also be warmed without the heating element by microwave for 1 1/2 minutes, or by immersing in boiling water.



La Briute Meal #1

Vegetarian Stuffed Shells$6.95 La Briute Meal #2

Vegetarian Pepper Steak$6.95


La Briute Meal #3

Vegetarian Honolulu Nuggets$6.95 La Briute Meal #4

Beef Stew Vegetable Entrée$6.95


La Briute Meal #5

Meatballs and Spaghetti$6.95 La Briute Meal #6

Cheese Ravioli in Tomato Sauce$6.95


La Briute Meal #7

Chicken Primavera with Noodles$6.95 La Briute Meal #8

Vegetarian Stuffed Cabbag $6.95

Rooflechicken 8th August 2005 15:04

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
We had an article around here somewhere not to long ago about someone being upset because the cows weren't being killed with an approved jewish knife when the rabbi was slitting its throat.

What?

maladjusted 8th August 2005 15:28

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
You ever see them doing that shit? Those cows bleed for a long fucking time.

Rooflechicken 8th August 2005 15:38

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
yeah, I've seen it. The cows looks so sad, you can see it in their eyes that they will be missing the rest of the herd, and they know death is immenant. I weep a little when I think about it. They were so full of life one minute, the next hanging by their ankles and bleeding out of their necks, while a big machine pulls their skin off while its still plenty warm. But dammit, they're tasty.

Rooflechicken 8th August 2005 15:39

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
IR speelling champoin

maladjusted 8th August 2005 15:43

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
My old cross the street neighbor used to slaughter pigs. He had all kinds of good stories. Well, not so good if you're in PETA, but you know what I mean.

He used to slaughter all the 4h pigs after the fair and he said they were all pretty docile so it used to bug him just a little because they'd look at him like "where's my treat?" and then he'd hit 'em w/ the bolt gun.

maladjusted 8th August 2005 15:45

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Phix
So how come PETA isn't protesting Jewish rabbis all over the place for supporting this "barbaric" practice.

What makes you think they aren't?

I've seen video of these procedures foisted on the public as representative of all slaughter houses by PETA and ALF, et al.

They're just not saying the J word.

Rooflechicken 8th August 2005 15:58

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Phix
I thought Mal and DBD were becoming PETA fags.


Hi Mark, I am Brian, nice to meet you.

Rooflechicken 8th August 2005 16:04

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Malbert Q. Adjusted, thats what it says in my address book anyway.

DieHippy 8th August 2005 18:34

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Those meals probably cost about $.002 more because they're kosher. I often wonder how much extra money I've spent on kosher foods. Every fucking thing is kosher, unless you go to the one grocery store on the west side of town where all the bald guys work.

Hung0v3r 9th August 2005 12:18

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
I went to pick something up in the Jew district in LA once. I was fucking starving. I walked into this pizza place and the dude had a beanie on. I was like: I'll have a peperoni, sausage, mushroom, onion, bell peppers. He said we don't have peperoni. I said ok, i'll have sausage mushroom onion blah blah. He says we dont have sausage. I was asking myself what the fuck is wrong with this place. Then i realized. Fuckin jews. it was horrible pizza

Hung0v3r 9th August 2005 16:09

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
i never sausage an advertisement

AnimalChin 9th August 2005 16:48

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Hung0v3r
i never sausage an advertisement



come on man

maladjusted 9th August 2005 16:54

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by AnimalChin


Why don't you just make that your avatar already?

Rooflechicken 9th August 2005 16:57

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
testicles

AnimalChin 9th August 2005 17:35

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by maladjusted
Why don't you just make that your avatar already?

cause then i couldn't cleverly post it when necessary.

maladjusted 9th August 2005 17:40

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by AnimalChin
cause then i couldn't cleverly post it when necessary.


AnimalChin 9th August 2005 17:44

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by maladjusted

you are pretty good at damnitgif

maladjusted 9th August 2005 17:48

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 















maladjusted 9th August 2005 17:50

Re: Finally! Jewey Jewenstein approved MREs!
 
That army of damnitgifs actually makes my lame ass old broken down computer's video card make noise.


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:03.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
®©™ 2008 NoBigToe ☻ A wholly owned subsidiary of BuyEssexWebSitesForCheap